Dating Craziness!

So basically I am in the worst stage of life, where dating is not only a neccesity, but a highly competitive sport. Unfourtunately I can only seem to attract the attention of those, who I do not want to date. That being said, here is a list of things that maybe potential daters should not do.
1- Probably telling a girl, a half hour long story about how you found your bright yellow truck... is not a good idea.
2- Just walking right into someones apartment, when you dont actually live there...not a good idea.
3- Trying to impress a girl, by telling her that you are independantly wealthy, and thus you do not need an education...not impressive.
4- Sneaking right up behind a girl, when she is innocently trying to get a drink of water, and hugging her backwords...probably really disgusting.
5- Offering your services as a personal massuse when no-one has asked this of you......AHHHH!
6- Telling someone that you love the way they eat their apples....creepy!
7- Watching someone out your living room window, and recording how many times they have worn a coat that week.....STALKER!
8- Finally, stroking a slipper while it is still on a girls foot, when she has never expressed the slightest interest in you....Bad idea!

These things have all happened to me, only very recently, with the same person. And the real tragedy is, that I cannot even avoid this cat, because he lives right upstairs, feels comfortable enough to walk right in my apartment, and stops at nothing short of stalking me! DATING...IT'S THE BEST! (said in my best Nacho Libre voice!)